I had no idea that Climate Change was this harsh

19°C, light winds from SSW, mushroom clouds, 60% chance of mild fallout.

Seen on Vista sidebar w/ 8-bit color setting.

One month's salary

I was at the supermarket today, where I encountered two prime specimens of us sophisticated, classy, refined Europeans.

She: Bare midriff, flip flops, belly button pushed outward, abdomen flabby and strechmarked.
He: Beer gut, formerly white tee shirt, lopsided ballcap, crucifix tattoo on right forearm.

One month's salary. That's how much I'd wager that these Herrenmenschen* think of Murricans as dumb, uncivilized hicks.

*Yes, I'm positive they weren't tourists. The flawless German was sort of a dead giveaway.

Mein Kampfy Chair

It's a "Le Corbusier LC4". I've wanted to own one ever since I was at a friend's house and sat in the one owned by my friend's dad. That was when I was about 15 or so. Feels great to fulfill a wish held for so long.

Actually, it's a replica of an LC4. I had to order it in England and it was manufactured in Italy. Originals are even harder to get and about two or three times as expensive.

It's definitely worth the money, though.

Freudian slip

Because I'm a dork who's feeling nostalgic, I went to one of them DVD-rental-by-mail sites and searched for "Flight of the Navigator". Only I didn't. What I actually typed was "flight of the vaginator".

Lucky the Belgians have tight gun control

If they hadn't, people could just, like, walk into a daycare center and kill a bunch of little kids. Oh, wait...

Let's talk about the weather

Although I'm not blogging much lately, I'd just like to point out that since about a week ago, the Great Outside is covered in roughly 25 cm (10 inches) of global warming.

Getting old

Apparently it's not enough that I'm about to hit the big Three-Oh in a couple of weeks. No, lately I have started to like tea. Tea, for the love of all that is cute and fluffy. Tea!

Now it's only a matter of time until I start using snobby tea paraphernalia and begin questing for ever-increasingly exotic flavors, like thyme-pumpkin or sage-watermelon* tea.



* (with whole fruits)

Overheard on the internet

CB: Well, there are other good TV shows.
Me: Not enough.
CB: Way too many.
Me: Pistols at dawn!

A wishing well, WWW-style

Change.gov invites every American to offer suggestions and ideas for the Messiah new President. Under "Open Government", the site encourages readers to "Share Your Vision" via email.

Oh, goody! I'll submit my suggestions right after I finish my letter to Santa Claus.

It's official

People will look back on the Bush administration and call it the good old times. Soon.

At least, now I have very good reason to wear this new t-shirt I designed:

Overheard at work

This conversation took place at 2200 hours via instant messenger. My awesome co-worker and I are both at our respective homes, he is doing some overtime on a customer's system via VPN.

ACW: Do you have any idea why the jukebox won't load the medium into the drive?
Me: Check whether the medium is in the shelf.
ACW: ppppppppppppfffffft....
ACW: Well, that was easy.
ACW: Couldn't you have given me a more sophisticated explanation?
Me: Well, it could also have been phase synchronicity interferences in the peripheral plasma phalanxes, caused by chronoton particle emissions from Romulan singularity reactors.
Me: But that would be too easy.
ACW: Nothing we can't fix with a flux capacitor.
Me: Either that, or duct tape.

I CAN HAZ PROGRAMIN LANGWICH?

U HAZ A LOLCODE!

Overheard at the opposite of work

...while playing BUZZ!:

Buzz: If you were sitting on a 'Texas Longhorn', what kind of animal would you be sitting on?
Me: A steak!

Unification Day

For some reason, on every 3rd of October, I have a strong desire to go to a bar in the former GDR and start a brawl.

I don't, of course; if only because I don't own a van and don't employ a former fry cook / stunt driver who could rescue me when I start getting my ass kicked.